I'm not really coming out of retirement, but an LROD reader sent me this rejection, which is personalized and from the New Yorker! I had to post it. Okay, that's all. (I'm like Cher with the false retirement announcements, right?) Peace out again:
Dear [Writer's First Name]: We regret that we are unable to use the enclosed material. Many of your images, however, are quite beautiful. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to consider it.