How to Succeed in Rejection

If they use the title twice in a rejection note it seems more like they did indeed read it closely and give it careful consideration. That is, if you fall for that kind of thing.

Thank you for sending your work to Narrative. We are always grateful for the opportunity to review new material, and we have given "Title" close reading and careful consideration. We found many strengths to recommend your work and, overall, much to admire. We regret, however, that "Title" is not quite right for us. We encourage you try us again in the future, and we hope that you will. Sincerely, The Editors  

BACKSTAGE | NARRATIVE PRIZE | ABOUT US | A Nonprofit Publication of Narrative Press

Good Riddance to Narrative

For my New Year's effort to purge today (1.11.11 BTW), I am unsubscribing to many cluttering newsletters, including Narrative Magazine.  I swear I got 3 emails a week from those peeps, and had really not read a single one for about a year.  So, a fond farewell to 2010 and with it Narrative Magazine.  You who still believe will have to alert me if anything noteworthy happens. In the meantime, I sent the novel revision in to Agent 99, who seemed truly excited to read it.  She said she'll get back to me after MLK weekend. Fingers crossed.

Taking a Pass

You probably only get accepted if you're already famous. I wonder if famous writers submit their work to Narrative using this plebian online method. Probably the really famous have their agents send the story by gilded messenger pigeon. (Do agents of the very famous still represent short stories?  In the old days, they did.) Forgive these musings because, really, what's the diff to me and you?

Time: It Passes So Slowly

From the mailbag today, came this: "Go to the duotrope website and under "what's new" look at Narrative Magazine. Two responses: One is a 10 day acceptance; the other, a 776 rejection. 776 days! [Scroll down the large list to #509 & #510.] Can you imagine?"  Unfortunately, I can.

You Don't Say

Famous Lit Blogger, Maud Newton, won this year's prize from the famous Literary Rag, Narrative Magazine.  You can read Maud's story here (if you want to log in, sign up and give them all your vitals).  If not, here's the opening of the story, entitled, When the Flock Changed:

    MY MOTHER WAS a preacher until the cops shut her down. Well, okay, she kept at it halfheartedly in our living room for a while, but the fire had wiped out not just her warehouse church and the halfway house she ran out of it, but her passion, her commitment, and maybe even, deep down, her belief. 

Congratulations, Maude.  I don't know you, but I like your glasses.

It Only Costs 2 Sawbucks, Poor Writer!

Oh, Narrative Writing Magazine, Narrative Writing Magazine! When will you learn? The $10 appeal goes like this:  "$10 IS NOT SO MUCH when you consider that Narrative publishes more fiction writers, poets, and artists than any other literary magazine—more than 125 authors and artists in the first five months of 2009 alone—and we give our content away, free. With Narrative’s $10 Campaign, one donation combined with many has the power to sustain literature. In these tough economic times, with funding for nonprofits down, we’re asking everyone who enjoys Narrative to participate. We need you." I guess the backstage pass didn't go over very well in terms of profits.

The More Online Magazines To Reject You With

Narrative Magazine is seeming more and more like a New Yorker wannabe, no?  (Plus I get an email from Narrative every 3 1/2 minutes.) If that's not confusing enough, Esquire now has an online fiction section, a bit reminiscent of the Narrative enterprise, in that your chance of getting published is pretty darn slim. They publish the likes of Stephen King and Don Delillo, but they also have a fiction contest you might like to enter.  

Did Narrative Mag Fix Fict Contest?

I got an anonymous tip to check out this aptly-titled post:  "Did Tom Jenks and Carol Edgarian, Editors of Narrative Magazine, Fix the 2008 First-Person Story Contest for Friend Gina Oschner?"  The question is already 8-months old, but the answer is ever green.  My mother-in-law would say that they are too attractive to be cheats, but commenters on the original post  (from the blog Arts and Palaver) have a lively debate.  What's your opinion?

Close Positive Rejection

From Today's Mail Bag:

From the Narrative 30 Below Contest. Feel free to post but please keep anonymous. I think this was what could be called a "positive attention" rejection, although I would be interested to hear from others if it's just the standard. I received this for both my submissions.

Dear _________,

Thank you for entering "[Story]" in the Narrative 30 Below Contest. Your work was carefully read and considered by several of our editors in what was a very large field of entries. We received more than four times as many entries as the New York Times College Essay Contest, and on that basis you can have a sense of how much competition was involved. The entries came from all around the world, and many deserved repeated readings and, like yours, received close positive attention from our editors.

In the end, however, we could choose only three winners and ten finalists, and painstaking decisions had to be made. We regret that your story was not one of our winners this time. We appreciate your participation in the contest, and we hope you will keep Narrative in mind for your future work.

An announcement of the winning stories will soon go out to the magazine's readership, along with a schedule of future contests.

Again, thank you for the opportunity to read your work, and please accept our kind wishes.

Sincerely,

The Editors

What says the peanut gallery?  

This rejection letter is:

A) A standard form letter masquerading as personal

B) A heart-warming personal rejection

C) An example of the sly folks at Narrative who want you to pay more submission fees though you don't stand a chance in hell

D) A & C

E) None of the above

*Drawing snitched from authonomy.

Summary of the Week?

Here's a write-in comment about another of Narrative Magazine's story of the week, from one of the mice.  I've added links:

what is up with this "looters" story? it reads like a summary of the story every middle-aged woman turns in for her first workshop. full of cliches and awkward summarizing (husband has affair and it's forgotten about, then suddenly he's in iraq?) and even bad edits; on the opening page the narrator refers to a character as "Michelle" before she is introduced as such.

wtf?

Maybe it's because the writer is pretty (see photo above) and has an impressive bio.

Get with the Scary Times, People!

I get an email every other day from the bozos over at Narrative Magazine announcing this and that: contests, featured writers, opportunities to hobnob with literary flames, or whatever they happen to be hawking.  

I was particularly struck by today's email featuring the Story of the Week, which invites writers to send in work and perhaps get chosen for a spotlight. The promo reads: "We love finding and promoting well-written stories by talented writers...click here to submit!"  This week's feature is "The Story of an Hour" by KATE CHOPIN!  Excuse me?  That's right...Kate Chopin! (Did she rise from her 100-year-old grave to submit?  Did they discover her...all over again? )  

Not that we shouldn't read classics, but....people, hello?....wtf!  

We are facing the worst economic crisis of our lives, perhaps of all times. Books are going to dive so far into the toilet that we all better learn how to breathe underwater when flushed down, or else give up now. Couldn't Narrative Magazine have picked some brave new voice from today? How about a little relevancy to bring literature back into good standing? We need leaders on every level now.  How about it?

Winners...But Not You

For all of you waiting with bated breath, here's the results of the latest Narrative Magazine contest (I know; it stings):

CONGRATULATES THE WINNERS AND FINALISTS
IN THE 2008 FIRST-PERSON STORY CONTEST

First Place ($3,000) Gina Ochsner On Principle
Second Place ($1,750) Heather Brittain Bergstrom Celilo Falls
Third Place ($1,000) Holly Wilson Night Glow

Ten Finalists ($125 each)
Alethea Black Mistake
Abby Frucht But You’re Not
Lisa Fugard The Ghost of Anton Viljoen
Ed Gray Freedom Cross
Barb Johnson Turn It Up
Twister Marquiss Spectator Sports
David Torrey Peters The Dressing Room
Marc Petersen Shopping in the Middle of the Night
Debra Spark 46
Terese Svoboda Recon

But oh so luckily, there's another contest, another way for these people to take your money:

Also announcing:
The 2008 Fall Fiction Contest, with a
First Prize of $3,000, a Second Prize of $1,500, a Third Prize of $750,
and ten finalists receiving $100 each.
Open to all writers, from August 28 to November 30, 2008.
All entries will be considered for publication.

Not You, Not Ever

Announces its Spring 2008 issue now available online and featuring:

FICTION
Richard Bausch         Italy, Winter 1944
Lisa Cupolo               Bread
Louise Jarvis Flynn A Windfall
Barry Gifford            The Age of Fable
Jeanie Kortum         Stones
Reese Kwon              Superhero
Mattox Roesch        All the Way Rider
Holly Wilson           Where’s the Beauty, Jimmy?

POETRY
Matthew Dickman
Mike O’Connor
Alberto Álvaro Ríos
Jennifer Tonge

NONFICTION
Lynn Ahrens        Going Hollywood
Rick Bass             Oil
Tom Grimes       The Leash
Donald Hall        Gaudeamus Igitur

WORKS IN PROGRESS
Marvin Bell
Amy Bloom
T. Coraghessan Boyle
Robert Olen Butler
Stuart Dybek
David Guterson
Jim Harrison
Min Jin Lee
Cynthia Ozick
Jane Smiley
Ayelet Waldman
and many others

CLASSICS
Stephen Crane     The Blue Hotel

Go to NarrativeMagazine.com.

The Narrative First-Person Story Contest, with $7,000 in prizes,
is accepting entries of fiction and nonfiction. Entry deadline: July 31.

_______________________________

Note From W,R:  This came today, following an email from earlier in the week with fabulous photographs of a very fancy party and all the literati smiling like fat cats.  As for this announcement, though, what's with the works in progress?  They won't publish your finished masterpiece, but they will publish the mindless scraps of famous writers.  Oh boy, that's taking reality too far.  I like the finished products, thank you. And, also many others? How many others?  Who's left? (Besides you and me, that is.)

A Letter From Today's Mailbag

Dear Writer Rejected,

Your blog is compulsively readable, and more than that, gives consolation and catharsis to other lost souls afloat on a sea of obscurity.

There's one thing I've always wondered about small lit mags, and maybe you or one of your readers will have insight into this. I'm virtually unpublished (published one short story, a couple years ago, in a volume that no one seems to have read), but I seem to get a lot of what I'm calling "nibbles." (Fishing metaphor.) I've gotten a lot of xeroxed form-rejections, but also a number of (mostly electronic) rejections which are much harder to decipher. They will call me by name and refer to my story by name, and then say vaguely encouraging things about my writing along the lines of "well written but not for us." Some of them have gotten me quite excited because they imply that someone at the journal actually read portions of my story, maybe even (imagine!) the whole thing.

But this may not actually signify more than the versatility of the rejection letter in the age of email. After all, how hard can it be to generate a form rejection that inserts individual names and names of stories? I keep imagining that journals have different levels of form rejections, and that maybe I've made it to one of the higher levels--but I have no real evidence for this, at all.

For example, I sent a story in to the SQ love story contest. Below is the letter I got back this week. It assures me that my entry "received close attention and positive responses." And a (desperate) part of me wants to believe that, at the same time that another part of me is sure that this is a 100% form rejection that everyone who did not win the contest received. It's a nice rejection letter (much better than many) but I can't help feeling that they're being extra nice because I coughed up the $20 entry fee! 

By the way, It's very strange that Narrative took over Story Quarterly, and now runs it, but on a single site and in such a way that you simply cannot tell the difference between one journal and the other! Anyway, here's the letter:

Dear [Redacted],

Thank you for your entry in our recent Love Story
Contest. “[Redacted]” was carefully read and
considered by our editors in a very challenging
process of selecting winners and finalists from among
many strong entries. The judging involved many rounds
of reading, discussion, and decision making, in which
your entry received close attention and positive
responses. We regret that in the end “[Redacted]” was
not one of our winners this time. We’re very grateful
for your participation in the contest, and we hope
you’ll keep Narrative in mind for your work in the
future.

An announcement of the winning stories will soon go
out to the magazine’s readership, along with news of
future contests.

Again, many thanks for sending your work, and please
accept our best wishes.

Sincerely,

The Editors

*********************
Dude: It's natural to want to believe that every form letter is actually a personalized missive indicating that you're a good writer.  We've all held that misguided belief at one time or another; some of us for years.  But after you've been around a while, you get to know the difference between standard form and personalized rejection (not that the latter is much consolation). Here's a thought for you to mull today:  Just because the above is a form letter doesn't mean you're not a good writer. You probably are. But, sorry, Virginia, it is just a form letter.  Still, don't give up hope entirely. We haven't. Well, some of us have, but not all.  I haven't.  I still send my stories out.  And sometimes, when I really need to get published to make myself feel better, I just aim a little lower in terms of lit mag quality.  

Keep plugging, 

--W,R

Anyone else want to chime in?

Remember Story Quarterly's Love Story Contest?

Remember how we weren't going to submit our love to SQ, which is hosted by Narrative Magazine, and we didn't? Well, Maud Newton did.  (Her friends Marie and a Alexi egged her on, she says, and she did it on the very last day possible, and she sent in an essay, not a story.)  

She won 2nd place.  Here are all the winners (not you):

First Place ($2,500) Elizabeth Stuckey-French Interview with a Moron
Second Place ($1,500) Maud Newton Conversations You Have at Twenty
Third Place ($750) Janet Burroway Blackout

Now they are stumping the new contest: 1st person story contest (essays welcome).  They must be raking in the dough to give it such big prizes, no?

Narrative Gives Free Pass (Wants to Pick Your Brain)

___________________________________________

From: Narrative Magazine 

Date: April 17, 2008 1:47:37 PM EDT
To: Writer, Rejected
Subject: Free Pass to Narrative Backstage
Reply-To: webmaster@narrativemagazine.com

FREE PASS to NARRATIVE BACKSTAGE

Please help Narrative shape its offerings to your interests by taking a moment to answer a few survey questions. In return, we want to give you a six-month free pass to Narrative Backstage, where you’ll go behind the scenes of great writing with Rick Bass, Ann Beattie, Charles D’Ambrosio, Jayne Anne Phillips, Robert Stone, and many others.

Our survey is short and will take only a few minutes to complete:
GET A FREE PASS NOW
Go to NarrativeMagazine.com.

_______________________________________________

Perhaps some of you fine rejected writers out there should go to Narrative Magazine and help shape offerings to your interest....or at last give them a piece of your mind.

UPDATE: In case you had any question about where this boat is headed, the four main questions in the survey are as follows:

1) Would you like to see more offerings of hard-copy books by well-known and important new authors from Narrative?

2) Would you like to see more offering of downloadable digital books and stories?

3) How many books have you purchased in the last 10 months?

4) Have you purchased a book featured in Narrative's First & Second Looks sections?

Effing Narrative Magazine

Thanks to a tip from a cheeky LROD Anonymous, we have this glory: A posting by Eric Rosenfield at Wet Asphalt about our beloved ex lover, Narrative Magazine, earnestly titled "F*** Narrative Magazine!"  Hold on to your hats, people.

Not A Magazine for the Untouchables (That's Us)

Thanks to an anonymous tip, here's some juicy insight into the strange business of the free online magazine Narrative (topic of much LROD speculation) in the form of an SF Chronicle article.

Here's how the article opens:

Tom Jenks and Carol Edgarian refuse to see the bad news about Americans' reading habits as most literary people do - as the end of civilization.

Although the San Francisco couple do not dispute the recent numbers from the National Endowment for the Arts - 2005 saw a 20-year low in spending by American households on books; among high school students, only 35 percent are proficient readers - they see a silver lining in the global reach of the Internet.

"This is a revolutionary period," says Jenks, 57, who has held fiction editor positions at Esquire, GQ and Scribner's. "And as with all revolutionary periods, it's one of enormous opportunity - I don't think there's ever been a greater period of opportunity for writers, for literary work."

"I think the transition for writers (from print to digital) is painful because it's new," adds Edgarian, 46, the author of the critically acclaimed novel "Rise of the Euphrates." "But the opportunities are enormous."

Five years ago this summer, the two set out to test their theory. Over 10 days during a vacation in Martha's Vineyard, they assembled a free online magazine called Narrative (www.narrativemagazine.com) with selections from writer friends such as Jane Smiley, Tobias Wolff and Joyce Carol Oates. The magazine's primary goal: to connect more readers to more literary writers. They even taglined the publication "The Future of Reading."

Fancy! Go here to read the entire article; it's fascinating.

No Backdoor for Me, Thank You

Got this crazy money-suck offer in my mail box today. I think it answers the questions raised lately about how things work over at Narrative Magazine. There does appear to be the cultivation of an entire caste system of writing, where only the lowly pay. Here, you can invest cash to hang out with cool writers, the main attraction.

Seems a little unseemly to me. What do you guys think -- legit or lame?

More, More, More

Oh, my rejecting ex-literary lovers just keep coming around my email box with new sexy writers on their arms and the contests I now refuse to enter, as if the goal is to make me feel bad. Which it does. Every time.

(#1)
NARRATIVE MAGAZINE
Great Literature. Online. For Free.
Narrative invites you to join 40,000 other readers at the leading revolutionary site for literature. Great writers—Ann Beattie, Joyce Carol Oates, Richard Rodriguez, Tobias Wolff, T. Coraghessan Boyle, Jane Smiley, plus a new generation of amazing young authors—are with us. Won’t you be? Please join us in an enduring love affair with words. log on for free at http://www.narrativemagazine.com/

(#2)
StoryQuarterly
We know that some of you may have encountered some recent technical difficulty while trying to send us entries for the SQ Love Story Contest. We wanted to let you know that problem with the upload page has been corrected, and entries in the contest are being accepted. The contest is open to fiction and nonfiction entries, and offers a First Prize of $2,500, a Second Prize of $1,500, a Third Prize of $750, and ten Finalists each will receive $100. Deadline for entries: March 31, 2008. For complete details, please click here. If you would like us to remove you from our announcement list please click here.