Count Down Day 23: Literary Agencies I Have Known and Cursed

I always thought I'd find a literary agent who would be my bestie forever and ever, but, alas, it didn't work out that way. In fact, I've had a series of ephemeral literary representatives who either I fired, or who left the business for a pregnancy, a retirement, a job in another field, a jazz career, or a prompt dismissal because she really hadn't agreed to be my agent in any official way, anyway. The latter is always the most heartbreaking: you work and work on the edits the agent offers and when you can't get it just so, they drop you like a hot potato. "Sorry, I just don't know how to go any further with this," or some such. The kiss off. But, what can you do? Most of these associations were tenuous at best. None of the agents were my BFF, and none of them will probably be that to me. I do still have Secret Agent Man still on my side for the non-fiction book I am writing, but that, too, is taking a long, long time, and who knows how patient he will be with me. Very, I hope.

Agent 99 Bites

People, people, people: You are going to hate this almost as much as I do. First, I ask you to recall that it's been a year of my working with said Agent 99 from the large fancy literary agency. Back and forth we went with changes and revisions and her idea about how to "fix" my novel. Together here at LROD we have discussed the merits of working on edits with an agent, of compromising one's art, but we have seen nothing like this so far. Are you ready for it? I am going to leave the picking apart of this amazing rejection to beat all rejections to you and your witty, wonderful ways.  You may also feel free to berate me about being naive enough to believe I was finally on my way; all I had to do was fix "a little structural problem" without "muddling" everything up, and that would be that. Have at it! I am taking to my bed today. As for our recent discussions about whether or not it is a good idea to respond to rejection letters, I thought of writing the following: Dear Agent 99: I'm not sure what's worse this week, the fact that after stringing me along for an entire calendar year, you are now rejecting me because my novel now seems muddled and always seemed to dark, or the fact that I have to face a painful biopsy for some suspected cancer.  You really stink.  Best, W,R. Of course, I will let my silence speak instead. Sadly, friends, the part about suspected cancer is true. I'm sure it's going to turn out perfectly fine and not be anything malignant, but then again, for a cynic, I am eternally optimistic.  I have a biopsy tomorrow, so may not get online to post until next week. Send some good thoughts my way if you are able. Man...life can be a kick in the teeth, right? What a week!

Here's what Agent 99 had to say:

Dear _________:   

     This is a difficult email for me to write, but after a lot of time and careful reads from me and a few trusted colleagues here, I’m afraid I’m going to have to walk away from [slightly incorrect Title of Book...really? You couldn't get it right?]. I really do admire you personally and as a writer, and I’m sorry it took so long for me to make this decision, but I don’t think we’re seeing eye-to-eye editorially in the way I would like. 

     I think you’re such a talented writer, and I love your style and your unique sense of prose and voice. That said, ultimately the book still isn’t working in the way I would need it to in order be its very best advocate. I have too many hesitations remaining, and indeed, even though we decided it was best to tie the two parts together (which I do think is crucial to the book) I’m still not seeing the execution I would like.

      The redraft has also confused the original intent of the book and muddled some of the elements I loved earlier on. In this incarnation, it seems so obvious to me that [name of character] is the culprit, and the adding in of [detail] and the [different detail] from the start creates so many plot lines, so many characters to focus on, that I lost [main character's name] a bit. I also still find the darkness of the book overbearing, an issue I’ve had throughout the times I’ve read, and worry that you haven’t found a way to alleviate this. 

     It’s very unusual that I take someone on editorially unless I truly believe in them, and I do believe in you, absolutely. But I also think we’ve come to an impasse. I only hope that giving you my time and advice on the manuscript has helped you in your journey a bit, and I’m sorry to say that my love for the book is not enough to take it forward. You and this novel deserve the passionate representation that I can’t provide, and so I think I should step aside before we go any further. I’m certain that I’ll see your name on shelves someday, and I’ll be cheering from the sidelines. 

     Yours,
     Agent 99

p.s. As you can see, she's really not "mine". Yours is just a nice thing people say at the end of a terrible letter. Oh well. Fuck it.

It's My Birthday today

Wouldn't it be great if Agent 99 wrote me today to say that she loves my novel rewrite and wants to send the manuscript out to publishers next week for a fresh, crisp start to September? That would be my birthday wish. That, or world peace. Or maybe just a simple hope that everyone out there from the Eastern parts of the U.S. did okay in that hurricane. I don't know. I lose perspective sometimes. Maybe it doesn't matter so much if the thing gets published in my life time. Maybe the sheer fact of writing it is good enough. One thing's for sure: This writing life is testing my patience.

Head Trip

A few more readers have weighed in and there's an interesting question emerging about the ultimate punishment of one of the characters (all others are redeemed).  Is it harsh enough? Might just be one of those discussion questions for the book.  Anyway, Agent 99 has a copy and so I'm waiting on her opinion now. In the meantime, I'm working on the non-fiction book; first marketable topic I've ever stumbled across. Basically, I'm sitting at my desk and writing. Otherwise, I got nothing.

Second Job, Anyone?

Speaking of which: I am close to finishing (again, I know), the new, new, new version of the old, old, old novel.  A few more fresh-eyed readers, a few more catches and small tweaks, and I will send it back to 99.

Down for the Count

Dudes, I had a little surgery yesterday, so was offline. Nothing glamorous like a face/ass lift or a nose/boob job.  Just a little oral situation that needed fixing so my teeth will stay in my head as I grow older. Very vulnerable having people sticking their hairy hands in your mouth and cut at your gums, though the Vicodin sure does help in a magical way.  Did you ever notice how good narcotics make the air smell?  Like pure goodness in the form of breathable gas. Last night, I also thought I could see the blood coursing through the veins in my hands. (As you can see, I'm not much of a heavy weight with the drugs.)  I'm already off them today, except for ibuprofen. I'll be back good as new, and chewing solids, by Monday. Have a good long weekend everybody. Agent 99 may be in touch with feedback as soon as Tuesday. I'll keep you posted.

Good Riddance to Narrative

For my New Year's effort to purge today (1.11.11 BTW), I am unsubscribing to many cluttering newsletters, including Narrative Magazine.  I swear I got 3 emails a week from those peeps, and had really not read a single one for about a year.  So, a fond farewell to 2010 and with it Narrative Magazine.  You who still believe will have to alert me if anything noteworthy happens. In the meantime, I sent the novel revision in to Agent 99, who seemed truly excited to read it.  She said she'll get back to me after MLK weekend. Fingers crossed.

Christmas Comes Early

I woke up this morning, and I knew how to fix my novel. I've been restructuring it since November, but I had a pacing issue. Figured out how to fix it the moment I opened my eyes.  Love that...better than Christmas morning, and probably just as spiritual an event. Got this message from the agent somewhat recently: "I cannot wait to read the new draft, I know I’m putting you through the ringer, but I really believe in this book." Very nice! I feel fortunate.

Monday Inspiration for Daunting Tasks

"Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes." --Oscar Wilde

p.s. Agent 99 got back to me with advice to dive back in one more time with some structural changes. She felt that the work we did this summer didn't exactly address the thing that we identified was wrong with the novel from the get-go. She was very kind and made some very lofty comparisons of how popular and literary she thinks the novel can be if I can fix the problem.  I was hoping not to have to restructure, for fear of ruining everything, but I think she's right; it's what I need to do. Turns out the six month hiatus was good.  After being away form it, I think I'm up to the task.  Sometimes time is just the thing to offer a fresh perspective. Anyway, I'm going back in; wish me luck.

Only Radio Static From the Agent

No word. I'm zen. Maybe Monday. How we suffer. Finished last rewrite end of August. Now, nearly November.  Still no word.  There was Frankfurt.  And other things. She's busy. I know.  But will she send it out?  Or send me back for more revisions?  Maybe it's good. Time brings clarity. Novels need to stew. As stated: I'm zen.  Sort of.

It's All Just Peanuts

Just a quick note to let you know Agent 99 is in Frankfurt at the Book Fair, but we have a date to meet at the end of October to discuss state of my novel: whether to work on it more or send it out. It'll be interesting to meet with her in person. I also can't help but think of all the time I could spend working on it now, but, you know, one thing you learn early about publishing is that you have no control over the time-frame, or over anything else for that matter.  So I'm just going to buckle in and go for the ride.  Oh, and, also, I'm starting to talk a lot about the new book that I'd started researching this winter.  I think that one is coming back strong to lift me out of my shoes and give me something to do.  Lucky me.

Update: Smoothing the Ruffle

Had a little ruffle with Agent 99 after delivering the new-to-her information that my novel had been seen by a few other editors a while back. She seemed unhappy with the news, but I described to her the previous plot line (so very different from current) and the fact that it had gone out under a different title, and I got this note back: "No worries -- it does sound very different, and I don’t think it will be a problem." Things in publishing have heated up, so she needs some more time to read the newest revision; she hasn't gotten to it yet.  You know, micicles, I'm going to have to stop reporting her every word on this blog. It's starting to feel a little uncool because she doesn't know about it, and I'm developing a relationship with her. I can tell you that I do not relish telling her about this blog, but will probably have to at some point feel like I must. Or maybe I will need to close it down before long, assuming it has had its day and run its course. Any opinions about how to handle this?

Update: Disclosure

I delivered my last round of edits to Agent 99 on Friday. So now I have to broach the topic of my novel's history. Agent 99 didn't ask about it, which is unusual, but I think her enthusiasm for the project and our working together on edits have preempted the normal line of questioning. I wrote to told her about this sorry incident about 14 months ago, and mentioned that a few other editors have seen much older versions of the novel, and a few who had seen my short story collection were interested in seeing the novel. But I also told her that I thought she should go out fresh and ride her luck, since my own has been rather tepid. I said maybe just let me know who you're sending it out to and I'll let you know if I have a history there. Of course, that would be too sparing, right?  She wrote back and thanked me for the information and asked me to send her a list of editors who have seen the novel, or requested to see it. This is tricky business, which in part makes me wish the novel were a virgin, but it's not. I'm just going to be honest with her, send her the list of those who have previously seen and rejected an older version of the novel and short story collection.  That harkens back about a decade; maybe all those people have moved on to more lucrative careers, like driving taxis and washing windows. I'll let you know what happens next.

Autumn Approaches

I had a fruitful discussion with 99 yesterday.  While we were talking, I actually had a brainstorm (such a dumb word that people use in my employment activities every day) and figured out how to fix one of the major narrative problems caused by a recent revisions.  It's all such a delicate tapestry, isn't it?  Pull one thread to tight and suddenly there's a big run in the middle of your plot.  Anyway, we decided to ignore all the other (committee) comments and try to get at the underlying issue.  So, I have one more (quick, I think) revision involving the rebuilding of some lost tension in the first part of the novel.  So, I'm back at it.  I did ask Agent 99 if she's thought about where she's going to send the manuscript and she said she had; she'd even spoken to a few editors about it. Looks like it's actually going out this fall, laddies and germs.  Aren't we lucky ducks?

Edits By Committee...Not

So, the new agent (99) hadn't been back to me since the last small revision, but recently wrote saying she had some peeps in her office read the manuscript.  They all had some pretty out-there suggestions, which she passed along.  Stuff like "make the kids twins" or "make one of the characters more villainous." I told her that I had to think it over, that I wasn't into edits-by-committee, that I didn't agree with their notes, and that maybe she and I should talk about what to do next. Her edits had been really great and right-on-the-mark, but these were pretty weird. Agent 99 wrote back immediately and said I should call her tomorrow any time and that she agreed with me. She wanted them to read my novel "because once I submit here in the states, then these will be the people working on your behalf in other territories." I liked that last sentence! I'll keep you posted on how the conversation goes.

Update: Third (and Final) Revision

Agent 99 read my novel's second revision under her care and had this to say:"I think this is much, much cleaner in the second half. My one (tiny) remaining comment is that [very small logistical fix about the placement of a character during a specific scene]. Also, maybe the importance of [one character's search] can be more apparent in the first third of the book? I also think [a scene idea I had about revealing a specific character's inner drive] early on would be nice- [then some specific advice about where to place the new scene]. Lovely work, sorry to send you back to the grindstone! You're so close now."  I've already made these changes and had been working on the additional scene already, so I'm going to send it back for a final read today! It's amazing when revisions click and everything falls into place. If you don't think about the 13 previous years of toil and torture, it's like magic.  Have a good weekend everybody.

Agent Appears to be MY Agent

Agent 99 read the latest revision of my novel, which focused on the first half of the manuscript; she left a voice mail saying she "loved" it.  Nice!  The problem is that now the second half of the manuscript lags....isn't that just the way?  So, she had a couple of ideas, but mainly I have to fine-tooth-comb the second half as I did the first, which I should have done before, but there wasn't a lot of time since the deadline was supposed to be for August 1st.  Anyway, the edits are minor now.  She had a knock-out idea for adding a scene between two characters that I think will be really great. Now I just have to figure out what that scene might be. The emotional content is there, but the logistics, you know?  That's the thing about novels...it all has to seem so effortless.  Anyway, though I'm on vacation (bobbing in the ocean as we speak...well, not really, but you get the idea), I'm back at it.  Not sure when I'll finish.  She'd like to send it out next Monday but wants me to take the time I need.  If I need more time, she'll send it out in September.  So, little tiny mice-icles: your good vibes and prayers this weekend worked!  Thank you very, very much!

Needed: Your Mental Powers

I sent the new, new manuscript off with revisions as discussed with Agent 99 (referred by this fancy dude).  Here was the return email received: "Fantastic! It sounds like you've done a lot here. Just so you know, I read on my weekends, so will get back to you early next week. I'm really looking forward to reading."  That means this weekend all you kind mice might wish to create a collective mind-meld of good and positive and hopeful thoughts about 99 and my novel, which you will remember I started writing in 1997. Are you up for it?  Should you choose to accept the mission, you will find a place reserved for you in literary heaven.

Update: Rewrite (version #2) Nearly Accomplished

I've finished the new rewrite for the new, new agent (Agent 99, as we shall call her henceforth), and I have a few of my peeps giving it a once over to make sure I haven't somehow gone over the edge. The good news is that I think 99's suggestions were very astute and make the novel stronger in a lot of ways.  There's only one item (easy to implement, but has a huge impact on the book) that I'm not quite sure I'll keep, but happy to give it a whirl and see how it feels on a fresh read down the road. From our conversation a few weeks ago, 99's voice is echoing in my head: "With this kind of book, the manuscript needs to be perfect to sell."  Ah, perfection, my old prison guard.  I thought I had long ago gotten rid of you!

Good News!!

The 99th agent is interested in the novel: praise the lord! Can you believe? Spoke on the phone today and came up with a plan for a reasonable revision. The comments were very apt and well-considered; the novel will be better for the effort. How about that folks? A little forward motion after all. Thank you for all your good thoughts, prayers, and breath-holding. I have to revise by August 1st, a tall order, but tonight I celebrate (and sleep), and let it sink in. Here is part of the joyous email received today: "Sorry for the delay. I finished [title of novel] and I’m a huge fan of the book. The premise is fantastic and the last half of the book completely drew me in, and even left me breathless in the rush to the conclusion. That being said, I had some thoughts as I was reading and wanted to see if you’re interested in working together editorially."