Awaiting Final Edits

I submitted my revised manuscript to the publisher a few weeks ago, and now I am awaiting a final edit, which is supposed to come in the next couple of days. I feel a little bit like a PTSD survivor, flinching and twitching, since we have been here before with this novel, so, so, so close, and then at the very last minute, the dreaded thumbs down arrives, and it's back to the drawing board. (I speak here in the royal we of course.) I do not think that's the case here (in fact I have a signed contract), but I cannot help flashing back to all those crushing moments.  So many of them.  Yesterday, I told someone that my novel had been rejected hundreds of times, and he raised an eyebrow at me.  "Hundreds?" he said.  Well, maybe not, but I should count. I should spend a day on this blog, trying to figure out how many rejections this poor little novel has suffered, so that I can offer up the official tally whenever asked. Let's see 15 years x 10-20 rejections a year, but maybe not every year. Yeah, the guy was right; it couldn't really be hundreds. But it sure feels that way.

And You Thought You Had MFA Troubles

This article entitled "How Iowa Flattened Literature" published today in the Chronicle of Higher Education is a hot mess and yet kind of fascinating. I'm not even sure I understand where it *is* going, even though author Eric Bennett writes in the middle of it, in his super confiding tone, "I'm sure you can see where this is going."  Also, confusing: the the article seems to be a mash-up of a personal essay about being a student at the Iowa Workshop published in an anthology entitled MFA vs NYC: The Two Cultures of Fiction in America and the author's new historical book entitled, Empire of Workshop, about the CIA and communism at the heart of the prestigious MFA program's inception. The latter is published by guess who? University of Iowa Press. So, it is a criticism? Anyway, though I have my own set of torturous topics, I am glad the cold war and questions of greatness are not among them. Check it out.

Need Anyone Say More?

Have a Laugh Please

What? It's time for Cartoon Friday already? 

Idea Has Been Done Before

Essanay Film Management Company from Chicago, IL, took the easy way out of rejecting screenplays and scripts back in the day.  Love the list, especially "Overstocked," "Not Interesting," "Improbable," and "Robbery, Kidnapping, Murder, Suicide, Harrowing Death-Bed and All Scenes of An Unpleasant Nature Should be Eliminated."  Indeed!

What's Your Lifetime Creative Earnings?

Today, because I'm a little bit anal and overly responsible, I'm pulling together my taxes, and realizing that in the year of our Lord 2013 my business writing earned enough income to sustain life (just barely), and my creative writing earned zero dollars and zero cents (zero sense). This is pretty much the same as it is every year, except for the occasional bonanza of a grant, fellowship, or lit prize with money attached, which due to the goodness of God falls in my lap once in a great while.
     If I had to tally my lifetime earnings for my creative writing over these few decades of my time here on earth, it would add up to about $44,000.00, and I'm counting a local library poetry prize from my long-ago youth. So that is an actual lifetime tally. The sad thing is, I am surprised by how much it is; not bad for a hack! By the way, has anybody seen that one 1099 from that company with the funny name? I can't find it all of sudden. How is it that papers can evaporate like that into thin air?  It's disturbing.
     Anyone else care to share their lifetime total earnings for creative writing? I don't tend to egg-on blog comments, but I thought that might be an interesting thread.

We Don't Know How Old You Are, But You're Probably Too Old

One of the good doctors over at Psychology Today has put together this self-made "improved" rejection slip, which he suggests enclosing with submission manuscripts.  It's a nice idea: putting the manner in which you receive rejection back in your own control. Check it out; he has an article with some other thoughts for your consideration. In my opinion, there is plenty of room in the world for more psychiatrist/detectives!

Pink is the New Black

Speaking of chick lit, my book cover is going to be bright pink. However, it has a large type treatment of the title taking up all of the cover. The publisher wanted it so because "mostly only men get bold type treatment covers." The above is the one that comes to mind: no comparison intended, of course.

Question of the Month: "Chick Lit"

I just read this New Yorker article about Jennifer Weiner's complaints concerning how her books are (mis)treated. She makes a noble and worthy argument on the state of books by women, which are ignored and often belittled, but then slightly confuses matters by comparing apples to oranges. No one is in fact comparing her to Chaucer, nor should they, and elite male authors do often seem to be held in esteem as if they were the father of poetry himself, which is irritating, misguided, and often absurd. But there are different categories of fiction in the world, and to make an accurate comparison of a commercial fiction book with a literary fiction book is not necessarily a cogent argument for gender inequality. Wouldn't Weiner do much better to insist on parity with the likes of Stephen King or Dan Brown--she should be treated like those highly successful, very good, male writers of commercial fiction. She should be compared favorably in the category in which she writes, and c'mon, of course she should be reviewed in the New York Times Book Review! To ignore her is ridiculous. But why maudlin Franzen would even occur as her likely comparator is a mystery to me. Your thoughts on the matter?

A Happy Publishing Experience

So far, I am having a pretty good time with the literary press publishing my novel. The editing process has been going well; I've filled out a ton of publicity forms regarding my own thoughts on how to market the book, I have people who have agreed to read the galleys and give a blurb, and the cover of the book is amazing. It took more than 15 years for this to happen, so I have to say I'm pretty grateful to start out, but I am also impressed with the immediacy and proficiency of the publisher.  I want to post the cover, but I think I'm going to wait.  One day I will simply post an entry into "Victory over Rejection," and you will all intuitively know that it is my novel.

Great Volumes, Batman!

Those New England baked-beaners are so formal. They don't read; they get "acquainted" with your work.  It's not terrible (see Saturday's post); it simply "does not suit" them. They aren't sorry they can't respond personally, they "regret the great volume of submissions they receive."  They don't want you to bug off, but to have "success placing your work elsewhere."  Thanks for thinking of them!

Is This For Real?

Boom! Now, that's an honest form letter for you. This is, of course, how most of the weary readers at these beleaguered  feel about it.  So, sing it, sister!

I'll Have A Classic Coke, Please

It's an American standard form rejection is what it is, a classic. I stopped sending out short stories a while back, though I do have a collection of them that was never published as a book. Ah, books! I know a writer who used to make a living in the newspaper business with a syndicated column. Of the 20 papers that used to carry this friend's column, exactly 1 is still standing today. What is the fate of these print literary reviews? I can't help but wonder. Remember when books were things people wanted to have? I am just as guilty as anyone; I gave away all but a small shelf of books, mostly keeping those that were published by friends, or those that I love to use for teaching, or those that I simply love beyond reason. Also, I imagine, that very soon these paper rejections will be a thing of the past too. I feel like my novel is one of the last to be published on actual wood pulp at this late date in the new Century, don't you?

Three Hundred Books to Read Every Week

I found this rejection online since it is now, apparently, all the rage to post one's rejections, though remember the good old days when people used to post comments telling me I would get sued and lynched, and I would never get published in "this town" again?  I wasn't getting published in any town anyway, was my thought on the matter.  That was what was funny.  That and the fact that no one really gave a crap about my posting my little treasure trove of rejections.  But when this whole concern started in 2007, it was a radical move to expose the names of the rejecters, which I have generally done. This particular found rejection has the name of the writer removed, as well as the last name of "Vicki, Agency Editor."  Because the title "Agency Editor" is so unusual, you can pretty much use the old Google-Whats-It and figure out who she is. Very young, bless her heart.

Some Wisdom Is Needed Here

Let's hear a few words from other writers like ourselves who have struggled with rejection and made it. (Any writer could probably qualify under those terms.) Though, do you think anyone ever feels like he or she has made it? I know of a very famous writer who lives in fear of never writing another book as good as the one that won him the Pulitzer Prize.  I also know of a very famous writer who was awarded a Nobel Prize after she was too old and infirm to collect it in person. Ah, life; a kick in the teeth, no matter how you slice it, right?

• “Rejections slips, or form letters, however tactfully phrased, are lacerations of the soul, if not quite inventions of the devil – but there is no way around them.” – Isaac Asimov
• “I discovered that rejections are not altogether a bad thing. They teach a writer to rely on his own judgment and to say in his heart of hearts, ‘To hell with you.’“ – Saul Bellow
• “I love my rejection slips. They show me I try.” – Sylvia Plath
• “Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae.” – Kurt Vonnegut
• “Often, you have to fail as a writer before you write that bestselling novel or ground-breaking memoir. If you’re failing as a writer – which it definitely feels like when you’re struggling to write regularly or can’t seem to earn a living as a freelance writer – maybe you need to take a long-term perspective.” – J.K. Rowling